Thursday, September 18, 2008

Aliens vs. Predator Requiem: The Live Blog

(Current Movie Time 30 minutes)

So yeah the live blog was a late idea and I've practicality missed the first half hour of the movie while tinkering with my fantasy teams. I doubt I missed any crucial plot developments, but I did catch out of the corner of my eye an alien busting out of a little kids chest. So thus far I guess I'm gonna pull for the Predators. There is also a pizza delivery guy who looks to be the main character. If this is the hero...this movie has already won me over. Wait he just let JTT (Jonathan Taylor Thomas) kick his ass in front of some broad. Not acceptable.

The Predators as I suspected are on their way. And I think one is about to kill a cop...and yep...there goes Lt. Quickkill.

(Current Movie Time 48 minutes in)

Quick update...I think the forecast calls for a slight chance of brief nudity. And Denied by JTT!...and here comes the fight...Okay Predator all of a sudden started kicking ass, be right back. The only black kid in the movie just got gutted by an alien...must have been going for endurance.

The battle is going full swing. The protaganists are holding out in a building of some sort while this whole thing blows over. I think the aliens are ahead on the kill count. Despite the lack of nudity this movie could be doing worse. The Army just arrived, so I think are about to get ridiculous (about to?). Uhhh......the aliens are in a hospital killing pregnant women

Now we throw in a government conspiracy. I tell you the twist and turn in this movie are as unpredictable as a knock- knock joke. Protagonists are in route to Giliam's Square (sp?) where there may or may not be an evacuation aircraft waiting for them. By the way...a pregnant woman had a litter of alien puppies burst from her like a fountain of Jello. Aliens are up by a lot, maybe they aren't judging this competition on overall body count....I'll go check the abstract on Netflix.

I just realized that one of the aliens is an AlienPredator hybrid. This would actually be a good time to say I never saw the first Alien vs. Predator I can only hope this was explained in that movie.

Well in what was an epic dual of extraterrestrials, I think we'll have to call this one a draw. After getting a group of protagonists the good ole U.S of A just drop a bomb on the site killing aliens, predators and even a few humans to boot. I feel obligated to chant U-S-A. What a weird last scene. They show some of the predator's weaponry to an older Asian woman, who declares that our world is not ready for this technology. The reply is simply "But this isn't for our world is it Ms. Utani". So I guess some how old Asian women are going to start hunting Predators now for the third movie. If it's as half as good as this movie, you can count me an iron maiden which would be complete bliss compared to watching another movie this bad.

No comments: