Robots, Skulls, Squids: Greensville Awesome Fantasy Football Great Job

2008 was the 5th anniversary of Greensville and by far the oddest. A strong draft really meant nothing once the season got going and no one knows that fact better than The Ghost of the Big Fish himself, Shaun "Shank" Nelson "Nelpin"

He didn't draft Tom Brady, Larry Johnson, Todd Heap or Marques Colston, but nonetheless his season fell apart faster than a Mexican house of cards (ZING!). I asked Shaun to write a guest column about his woes and he obliged.

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Oh where do I start? I have had such an awesome year! Lets start around when I drafted Shawn Merriman

“Naw dude, I’m cool …I can play …”

Ok that was totally my fault … he was already hurt and I was dumb for thinking he would do anything while he played with a season ending injury…also did you see that pic cus he def did some roidage!

Lets move on to another of my mistakes , Willis McGahee … this asshole cant decide if he wants to play or not before every f’n game …. and of course when I play him he doesn’t do shit …but then when I leave him out he might play a game and score 20 some odd fantasy points …I think it has a lot to do with his PIE addiction

Moving on to the next pile of shit … Chad Johnson ….sweet sweet ocho cinco …good ole happy-go-lucky 8-5 , seriously what was I thinking here this guy is a jackass. I knew I made a huge mistake when he didn’t even score me 2 pts the first week and didn’t score more than 10 pts until week 4 …but then went back to under 10 for another couple weeks …Luckily here I was able to pawn this guy off on dirty (and then he didn’t score any points or even play for that matter) not that I scored real big with Marvin Harrison …but I was winning after the trade!

"I just scored 4.80 points"

Awesome. So yeah already some big name guys are killing me when I thought I was gonna be golden this year, especially with my favorite first round pick LT ! Ohhhhhh yeah precious LT …yeah here is where I want to punch Norv in the face-

"I really am an idiot..."

Ok, I can accept LT needed some time to warm up his toes …but ‘den…but ‘den …

ANTONYO Gaytes!!!!! Yeaah … this guy has jammed me all year … he started out cold …healed up and got better and then fucked me at the worst possible time… I even kept the faith and wouldn’t trade him to dirty or derek … yeah they probly enjoyed his failure after my rejections…

He should have spent more time trying to get the ball and less time befriending small boys

So yeah I never will learn that drafting too many players on the same team isnt an awesome strategy…. Because I did it like 3 times this year

not only did I grab up LT and Tonyo ..yeah I got me some Carson ” fag-arm” Palmer (thinking he was gonna connect like a mug with Ocho) he was such a bust that I also could have unloaded earlier in the year had I been trade crazy like dirty…

I wish that hot dog was a huge black dick. (real classy Shaun)

Because of Carson’s “fag-arm” I ended up with Gus Fagotte who did ok for a back up and I cant really complain …but I also had Bernard “inconsistent” Berrrian who apparently didn’t learn to catch balls until later in the year …
Ok I am running out of steam here so let me wrap this up with a few more honors.

I definitely got jammed a couple of times by Lee Evans, who finally seemed to be stepping up and the all of a sudden he just stopped showing up...thanks Lee

PS- You can't catch the ball if you are trying to use your face.